The last 24 hours with a family crisis… however i didn’t binge.

At the hospital till all hours… a family crisis, a perfect excuse for emotional eating. How do I remain strong for those who need me to take care of myself enough to be fully present and supportive? I don’t binge for today, to use program speak… perish the thought. Workout this morning, a swim which was tougher than I had anticipated. I am seriously in trouble with my body. Young, but not as young as I once was so to speak. Over, over, over weight for far too long. To write I have taxed my body is to understate the gravity of my dilemma. The more I work out the more I see how weak I’ve allowed myself to become. I also see I have unlimited waves of strength I never knew I possessed. There are no more excuses. There were never any good ones.

 

We ate Indian, spinach, onions, shrimp, rice, dal, cauliflower, potatoes, no cream in the sauce, lychee juice (no sugar) and tealuxe pots of teas (copley vanilla black tea with a spot of milk – absolutely delicious). I had some cheese and a few non regulation crackers, will have to give away the rest and stay away from the flour. I hope my relation pulls through and does not suffer anymore. All I can do is show up healthy and awake and offer love. That’s enough. I’m enough.